Vulnerability + courage in the pursuit of purpose
Trigger warning: sh*t’s about to get real vulnerable.
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“Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.”
Says that girl who travels the world for a living, I thought to myself [time and time again].
If I had a dollar for every time a Tony Robbins look-alike preached to “pursue your passion and the money will follow”—well, I’d be rich. Or perhaps poor if I’d taken their advice at face value.
It’s always made me cringe—nay, seethe—when I hear those words. ‘Cause while the idea of pursuing purpose-driven work sounds invigorating and even magical, it’s not always practical. And it sure as hell isn’t as easy as they make it sound.
But let it be known, there’s one tried and true catalyst of life-altering motivation that will challenge you to look within, dig down realll deep and give you the confidence to throw caution to the wind, say f*ck it and do a complete 180° with your life. Really, the whole world is currently grappling with it—and that catalyst is hardship [ *cough* trauma].
Sometime amid my pandemic-induced depression [a generalized trauma for us all], my dad died. While it was a sudden death, it wasn’t entirely unexpected—he had struggled with addiction for most of my life. It was difficult, but if you’ve experienced addiction firsthand, you won’t be surprised when I say that his passing lifted a weight off my chest that had been numbing me and stifling my voice for far too long.
Needless to say, trauma changes us. Sometimes for the worse…hopefully for the better. For me, the end of a traumatic era was an awakening of sorts—like I could breathe again and feel true joy without the crushing weight of guilt filling my lungs like quicksand. I grieved like I needed to, and picked up [most] of my broken pieces—and so began a newfound journey.
We were embarking on the proverbial pursuit of happiness.
When the motivation’s there, but you don’t know what to do with it
Open LinkedIn at any point in the past few years, and you’ll be bombarded with the same content I’m writing right now—people up and leaving [AKA “quiet quitting”] their day jobs.
“…I’ve decided to leave XYZ company and I’m excited to join ABC company.”
“…I’ve decided to retire early, because why the hell not.”
“I’ve decided to leave my corporate job, pursue my passion, and start my own company.”
And while the reasons and seasons varied, the sentiment was fairly consistent. In essence, the whole world seemed to have had the same awakening that I had just had—and in that awakening came this desire to pursue purpose and passion. Instead of the usual “means to an end” complacency, people started to think, “what if…” and reimagine the possibilities of life. Maybe we all realized that life’s too short to spend our days doing something we’re not absolutely enthralled by and genuinely stoked to be doing.
So we’d come full circle… back to “do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.”
But as someone who’d been working a steady job since they practically left the cradle, I couldn’t even fathom kicking over that corporate ladder, leaving the oh-so-cozy comfort zone and venturing out to discover my passions. Until one day, I did an eye-opening exercise that woke me up, completely.
How I finally put a label on the ever-so-enigmatic ‘purpose’ of my life
During a leadership course I underwent in 2021, I completed a series of exercises in a book called The Discover Your True North Fieldbook by Nick Craig, Bill George and Scott Snook. [If you’re on a journey of self discovery, I highly recommend it].
As the authors put it, “This field book offers you a series of exercises encouraging you to delve deep into your life story, discover your passions, and develop into an authentic leader.” It helps you define your values, your intrinsic motivations, and your definition of success—all wonderful things that are very much part of self discovery. But the one exercise that led me to my ah-ha moment was titled Rediscovering Your Passion and Purpose.
On page 156, the authors reference three areas of your life journey that can help you rediscover your purpose:
Magical moments experienced as a child, where you became lost in the joy of an activity before the world told you what you should or shouldn’t be
Things you love to do that will always be a part of who you are
Times in your life when everything else was stripped away and your purpose revealed itself [AKA your ‘crucibles’]
As I completed the questions in this exercise, I couldn’t believe how plainly my purpose had been staring me in the face my whole life—and I had never truly leaned into it. For me, it was writing.
As I worked through the exercise, I reminisced on the time that I opened a Word document and started writing a “novel” for pure joy [I was probably 9 years old at the time]. When I was 12, I took pride in writing CD reviews for a student-led publication [if you don’t know what a CD is… ouch]. I recalled some of the most difficult times in my life where I had leaned into poetry as a form of expression, and the many times that my colleagues and family members had told me that written communication was my superpower.
Finally, it started becoming clear to me how this one thing—my passion—had been interwoven through every aspect of my life for as long as I could remember. It was present in the career I pursued, in my hobbies, in the way I expressed myself to the world. But because it had never been what I do to make money [aside from little bits here and there], I had never considered it to be something I should spend more time doing—and certainly never thought that it’s something I could potentially do to generate full-time income.
Why pursuing your purpose is a head-on collision with vulnerability
That description might be a bit graphic, but it’s genuinely how I felt when I asked myself these questions:
What truly makes me happy, and how can I make money doing that?
What am I willing to sacrifice for that happiness?
Who would even hire me to do that thing that makes me happy, anyways?
I assure you that imposter syndrome, self-doubt, fear of financial repercussions and innate human urge to stay FAR away from risk [especially as a highly risk-averse person] were all very real as I thought about these questions. I also thought long and hard about the career goals I had built into my life from day one—climbing the proverbial corporate ladder until there wasn’t any higher to climb. But then I thought… and then what?
Just as equally as it scared me to consider the risk of venturing out on my own, it thrilled me to think of the reward. Soon, I was calling everyone I knew who could give me any advice about leaving corporate life and starting anew. Just as soon, I was waking into a new reality—discovering that doing more of what I love is entirely possible, and that I could absolutely make a living in the process.
The start of a new era — here’s where I’m at today
Earlier this summer, after much over-analyzing, many long conversations, and a whole lotta’ number crunching, I decided to take take the plunge. I quit my job. Since, I’ve learned to navigate the waters of opening a business [someone seriously needs to write a manual on that… maybe I will] and have started anew from the comfort of my home office.
It’s only been a few weeks, so this might sound naive—but I am so happy. Although it’s a minuscule amount of time, it’s been a time filled with doing work that I truly love and that I’m wholly enthralled by. I feel revitalized and renewed—and only excited about what the future has to offer. This is what they meant when they said “do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.”
Introducing… Edelweiss Marketing!
First off—if you’ve read this far, bless your soul. I wrote this passage for many reasons… in hopes that maybe a single person who feels complacent or unsatisfied in their day-to-day might read it and think if she can do it, so can I. I also wrote it to introduce the people I love and my extended network to my new passion project: Edelweiss Marketing. Here, I’ll be helping businesses bring their stories to life in ways that connect with their customers. And I’ll be damn happy doing it.
If you find yourself in need of a storyteller—you know where to find me.
Thanks for reading,
Rosalind